Vs. Self Love

woman and baby happily pose for selfie

There comes a time in all of our lives where we struggle with putting ourselves first.

We focus so much on making sure everyone else around us is happy – our family, friends. We sometimes forget about our own happiness and we sacrifice our happiness for the happiness of others.

When I became a mother people would always tell me “sleep when he sleeps.” In my eyes, it didn’t quite work that way. I was constantly watching over my son when he slept because I was a first-time mom and worried about everything. Now, every time he even sits down, I make sure to rest also.

We may have to go through our own experiences in order to gain an understanding as to why it is so important that we love and take care of ourselves.

As a mother, I do have to make sacrifices but I also have to remind myself of how important it is to make sure I am happy and at my best. My son can always sense when something is wrong and now that he’s older, he understands.

Self love comes in different forms. Although it means to be happy with yourself and to love yourself flaws and all, it means so much more than that.

You have to love yourself enough to do better for yourself. College is exhausting and life in general can be exhausting. Focus on making sure you are doing everything for yourself, to make sure you are happy.

This can start with school but it also can start in other areas like relationships, no matter the kind.

People go through so much in relationships and get stuck to the idea that relationships are “supposed” to be hard because nothing’s perfect. Self love starts with knowing how you deserve to be treated.If you have a friend who is always putting you down, realize they are not your friend.

This semester so far has been really great for me. I’ve finally found my passion and what I love to do. I leave campus excited every Tuesday knowing that I spent all day writing and doing what I love.

There came a point in my life where I couldn’t express that out loud without someone making it about themselves. Then I caught myself censoring my conversations because I didn’t want to make anyone else feel bad about what they were doing in their lives.

It wasn’t until I realized that I stopped expressing my excitement around certain people that I realized I was changing myself and the way I spoke at the expense of my own happiness worrying about someone else’s.

I didn’t just change the way I spoke but I noticed that I started to allow so much that I wouldn’t have allowed before. I allowed myself to be mistreated in various ways because I wasn’t focused on loving myself.

I have fought my entire life to turn my dreams into reality and it wasn’t until recently that I realized I was sacrificing that dream for people who should not have had such a strong hold on my life. I work hard for my son and that is how I got here.

I know it can be hard to let go of someone so close, whether it be family, friends or even a partner. However, there are things that should not be tolerated and it’s up to you to make the decision to put yourself first. It won’t be an easy decision, but it’ll be what’s best for you.

Your friends will try to help you, and anyone close to you will try to tell you what’s best for you. You won’t listen and sometimes you may even lash out not them because you can’t accept what it is.

Self love starts with you. Know your worth and you know that your victories are not shortcomings. You work hard to get where you are. Continue working and believe in yourself, even if it costs you relationships with other people. I read somewhere that sometimes it’s about chasing a dream no one can see but you.

Never stop dreaming, and never apologize for doing so.