As journalists, we are constantly searching for stories that have never been told and strive to cover our community as best as possible. And often times, we take on topics that are known to cause controversy, in order to bring awareness to issues with truth and fairness to all.

As such, we look to you, the reader, to comment on such issues as the Sundial welcomes and encourages comments from all our readers. Fostering discussion from those expressing differing points of view is paramount in upholding the freedoms of speech and press to which we are entitled.

Yet it has come to our attention that many of the comments made on our Web site about the story, “CSUN MEChA members claim harassment by undercover LAPD officers” that was published on October 2, has received a mix of constructive and offending comments made to specific groups of people.

We, as your campus newspaper, feel we have a moral obligation to always provide a safe and open environment for people to express their opinions, but at times we reserve the right to delete any comments that can be deemed offensive without prior notice.

Let it be clear that the Sundial does not endorse any of the comments made by non-staff members.

Thus, our new commenter’s policy will make space for clean and clear dialogue where people can feel safe to discuss their opinions.

Our policy encourages “on topic” comments that respond to the content in the article, that  are responses to comments left by other readers, that are open to being contradicted by other readers and or might disagree with the content in the article, as long as they do not insult the writer of the article or other commenters.

Comments that will be deleted are comments that: are fraudulent, libelous, defamatory, obscene, pornographic, sexually explicit or indecent.

Also those that threaten, invite or encourage violence, are derogatory toward others on the basis of political affiliation, gender, race, ethnicity, national origin, religion, sexual preference or disability will also be deleted.

Commenters who misidentify or misrepresent themselves will also be subject to deletion.

The commenter policy is not meant to hinder or censor any form of speech; it is simply set up to remove any speech that will stop the flow of opinions.

This is a decision that has been made after several incidents including those of the story, “Examining the role blow jobs play in relationships” published on September 10, where defamatory comments were made towards the readers and Sundial staff, that left many insecure about their safety.

This is a move that we hope will continue to support our freedom of speech while still serving our moral obligation to have an equal space for all.

Sincerely,
Jacky Guerrero,
Online Editor, Daily Sundial

Last month, the “Blow job” article squirmed its way into the Daily Sundial, grabbing the attention of students and faculty all around CSUN campus. The negative reactions that have spiraled out from this may have to do with the article’s lack of clear intentions, important statistics and useful facts helpful to sexually-active college students.

The author of the opinionated article spoke of her literal distaste for oral sex quite openly in regards to her experiences with her boyfriend of over four years. Not only did she list the reasons why she does not perform oral sex (“afraid of swallowing” as being one of them), but she also did not address the serious psychological and emotional damage from being pressured to give oral sex in a relationship and how that affects a grip of students on campus.

Instead of writing a frivolous article about personal insecurities, students on campus would benefit more from an article focusing on date rape. According to the National Survey of Sexual Violence on College Campus in 1988, only 27 percent of the women whose sexual assaults met the legal definition of rape, thought of themselves as rape victims. Even more surprisingly 42 percent of college women who are raped tell no one about their assault. Unfortunately, the percentages have significantly increased since then.

Now by no means am I concluding that the author of the article was in anyway, shape or form sexually harassed by her boyfriend, but she even admitted, “Recently my boyfriend has been pressuring me into giving him a blow job.” The risks of feeling pressured to perform any type of sexual activity is a growing problem and can lead to severe consequences, which is what the article should have touched bases with.

By definition, rape is any act of sexual intercourse that is forced upon a person. Date rape is specifying that the victim is dating the person who rapes him or her. When it comes to sexual relationships among college students, it is easy to get wrapped up in the idea of wanting to constantly please your partner, quite possibly in hopes of that person returning the favor. However, studies show that sex is truly enjoyable and healthy when the partners all give consent for it to happen.

The article could have had more of a positive effect on CSUN students if solutions to being pressured to give oral sex had been actually addressed. The article also highlighted other student’s opinions of oral sex and whether the issue is prevalent in their relationship or not. Majority of the responses that came from female students said they do not enjoy performing oral sex for many different reasons.

Instead of bashing the male genitalia and offering, quite often, too many excessive details, risks of performing oral sex should have been highlighted at least once in between the negative opinions. According to www.aids.about.com, “Millions of teenagers become infected with STD’s such as chlamydia, gonorrhea, HIV and herpes each year and oral sex is a route by which teens are becoming infected.” College students are constantly reminded to practice safe sex, yet there are so many students right here on CSUN campus that have unplanned pregnancies and sexually-transmitted diseases.

The article would have received much more positive feedback if details to counseling office hours on campus regarding sexual assault would have been listed. Even more importantly, students that are truly affected by the issues of performing oral sex in relationships without their consent, would have felt support from a fellow outspoken student, and possibly found help.

Realistically, the author of the article might have started off with good intentions in hopes of reaching her fellow peers, however, a lack of statistics, facts, and important information delayed the point. According to a professor in the Journalism Department, “The article should’ve targeted the readers of the Sundial who are sexually-active and need facts as opposed to personal experience.” I can’t say that I could agree with her anymore.

As we all know, sex is a very hot topic. Whether we talk about it freely among friends or for educational purposes, it’s bound to cause some controversy.

This was the case when the Sundial published an article on September 10, “So whose pleasure is it anyway?” stating why some women feel uncomfortable when it comes to performing oral sex on their boyfriends. Was it the picture? Was it the article? Was it the fact that the word “blow job” was used?

I’m not bashing the people who spoke out against the article. Everyone has the right to express his or her opinion and points of views. However, I do believe we’re in the year 2009 and our generation is one of acceptance, tolerance, open-mindedness, change and progression.

Sex is everywhere. It’s shown in movies, music videos, lyrics of songs, talk shows, books, etc. The rapper Pitbull is known for his explicit lyrics regarding sex. His videos show half-naked women dancing and bouncing their booties. Britney Spears, in her first video came out in a schoolgirl uniform and pigtails, singing “Hit Me Baby One More Time.” Her most recent song “If You Seek Amy” had many speculating that the lyrics implied she was looking for someone to have sex with her.  What about Lil Wayne’s “Lollipop” mentioning only oral sex?

I can’t talk about sex without mentioning all of the “American Pie” movies, “The 40-Year-Old Virgin”, “Zack and Mimi Make a Porno”; I could go on forever.  These movies were based entirely on sex.

These are prime examples that sex is in everything we see and hear. If we’re going to get upset about a picture or article that doesn’t show nudity, genitals or someone’s face, and because the word “blow job” was used, where’s our priorities in what really matters?

I would be the first to admit TV can influence us on sex causing major confusion and turmoil. I know because I get confused sometimes on what I should do, what I want to do, and what I’m expected to do.

I feel this hurts us because we are college students in the peak of our sexuality and curiosity. Not only that, but we’re in the new millennium with all theses movies and songs throwing sex at our faces, and still, we have to battle with the fact that sex is considered a taboo subject.

This day in age, sex shouldn’t be considered taboo. We should talk about it freely.  I sometimes feel like we’re living in the 1900s because whenever someone mentions anything that has to do with sex, some people automatically treat it as something dirty, vulgar, and obscene.

Sex has been taught to us since we were in high school and junior high. By the time we reach college, it no longer should cause embarrassment. We’re in a college environment where we shouldn’t feel judged when we talk about sex.

Right now, most of us taste the meaning of independence. Our parents are no longer packing our lunches, tucking us in at night, picking out our clothes, brushing our hair, and walking with us to class.

Now is the time we have to be adults and make wise decisions that could affect the rest of our lives. The Sundial in no way is teaching people how to behave when it comes to sex or forcing anyone to believe something they don’t want to, or to do something they don’t want to do. It’s our choice whether we want to act out or not.

Like I mention before TV can influence us, but in the long run it’s up to us to make the right decision. As growing adults, we have the ability to say yes or no. We can’t blame a newspaper, TV, or friends from what we are doing. We have a mind of our own. We know what’s right and what’s wrong.

But again, we still face uncertainty and we’re not perfect. We still have questions.  Even though we’re adults we make mistakes, so what a better way to have an outlet by students for students.

An outlet creates communication and solidarity with students that might be facing the same doubts that other students might be dealing with.

We’re not a black and white generation. We’re a generation dealing with things such as Prop. 8 and I believe it’s time to get over words, sex, pictures, and focus our time, energy, and effort into things that really matter and affect us personally.

Photo Illustration. Photo Caption: Caitlin Mccarrick / Staff Photographer

Remember the 1950s when everything, not just TV shows, was black and white? When sticking to the status quo was the status quo. Exactly, neither do I.  Back then, the concept of sex was simpler hugely due to the fact that what was talked about was largely accepted.

Theoretically in the 1950s, men liked women, women married men, and the only man a woman would ever have sex with was her husband—the first time being their wedding night. Up until then a woman was expected to be pure, untouched—a virgin.  The man, not so much, but that’s an entirely different column.

Let’s face it, we come from a jaded generation and we’ve seen or heard it all before. For now let’s focus on one thing:  virginity.

Using the simplest, and possibly most vague definition, someone is a virgin up until they have sexual intercourse.  And by “sexual intercourse” I’m referring to penile/vaginal penetration.  None of this oral, anal, in the ear nonsense, strictly wee-wee meets yaya.  But in this day and age this isn’t necessarily the case.

People, mostly of the younger generation, have started to refer to themselves as virgins even if they’ve engaged in sexual activities.  Enter the world of the “I’ve done everything, but…” population.  These are people who have taken the “sexual intercourse” phrase to heart.  They tend to believe that even though they’ve engaged in “outercourse”—oral sex/hand jobs/ basically contact involving at least one sexual organ, but not necessarily penile/vaginal penetration—they are technically still virgins.

Is this fair to “true” virgins who have not engaged in any sort of sexual act?  Doesn’t this establish a sort of double standard?  “Everything, but” virgins call themselves virgins, yet they are still able to engage in pleasurable deeds.  Talk about the best of both worlds.  So how did the “everything, but” virgins come to be?  It’s simple. Blame the previous generations’ conservative outlook on life, even dating farther back than Clinton’s “I did not have sexual relations with that woman” days.

The “everything, but” individuals were able to come up with conditions, loopholes if you will, to enjoy contact with the opposite sex without disappointing granny.  This is taking on virginity as something purely physical. But is that all there is to it, or is the concept of virginity all in someone’s mind?  Someone may not physically be pure and yet they may consider themselves a virgin because they feel they haven’t given themselves fully, mentally and emotionally to another person.

By now you may start to question what the big deal about being a virgin is all about.  The answer is written throughout the media, in TV shows, movies, books, you name it and someone somewhere is usually trying to get lucky.  For women, whose sexuality is constantly scrutinized by society, virginity has been seen as something that is given to a man, a service.  A woman will hold on to her virginity until she finds the perfect man to give it to.

But wait, isn’t sex commonly used for procreation and pleasure, and usually not in that order?  If a woman puts such a strong emphasis on keeping her virginity, then what does that say about a woman who has sex for pleasure?  A woman who does not save her virginity and frequently has sex may be labeled a slut, possibly one of the worst things to call a female.  Does that mean the best thing to be called is a virgin?  Where’s the in-between title?  And why is it that when referring to virginity, we tend to only think about a woman’s virginity?  Men are born virgins, too.Oh, but when they “lose” theirs, they’re referred to as studs.  Ah, the proverbial sexual double standard.  Just another way to prove that virginity is multifaceted.

Alright, it looks like we’ve hit a fuzzy area.  So let’s go ahead and hit one last one.  The idea of traditional sexual intercourse, with the wee-wees and yayas, doesn’t always apply to all couples.  What if we’re dealing with two yayas?  In other words are two lesbians who are in a relationship, and who have never had any sexual contact with a man doomed to forever be labeled virgins by conventional standards?  Reasoning like this plagues the minority pockets of society.  But that’s not to say that different beliefs are incorrect.

I think we’ve come to our conclusion in our mission to define virginity.  And the truth is, there really is no conclusion.  And the even sadder truth why we don’t have a conclusion is because people are too hesitant, for whatever reason, to open up about virginity.

Virginity is subjective, each individual has their own definition of the word which is then reflected in their actions.  We all just have to face the fact that a lot of things in the sex world aren’t so black and white.