Not all condoms are created equally
After a romantic dinner and a hand-in-hand walk down the beach, you and your date are back home and things are getting steamy. Right before the moment of truth, you reach into your pocket and pull out your protection: a condom. All systems go.
But for those who either have never used a condom during sex or have never had to buy one themselves, the choice on which type is best can be daunting. Condoms come in enough different shapes, sizes and colors to confuse even the most promiscuous Don Juan.
Here are five kinds of condoms, rated on a scale of 1-5 (Rubber Rating), which could help you make the right choice for you and your partner.
There are three words every man wants to hear when it comes to managing his manhood: reliable, comfortable and solid. A classic choice, the garden-variety Trojan is simple, yet effective. It’s sturdy enough not to break and there is minimal slippage. The only gripe about these is they are a little on the thick side, leaving it less pleasurable for the wearer. Opting for the spermicide-coated version could leave your hands smelling pretty funky and partners won’t want that stuff anywhere near their mouths. Still, for those who are looking to make their first condom-buying experience a positive one, you can never go wrong with a classic.
Package opening time: 1-3 seconds
Overall Rubber Rating: 4
Trojan Her Pleasure
The name says it all. These condoms were made for achieving the big O. With two different areas of ribbing, this condom will have your partner wondering when you became such a stud in the sack. When you put it on, it looks like the condom doesn’t fit because there is some extra material in the top-half, but little does your lover know that this is what is going to make their toes curl for the latter half of the night.
Package opening time: 1-3 seconds
Overall Rubber Rating: 4.5
You get what you pay for. These babies can be found on the way out of your friendly neighborhood women’s clinic and at our beloved Klotz Health Center on campus — for free.
But don’t let the easy access fool you. This brand of condoms are by far the worst form of “protection” for any couple. They slip off often and break easier than an iPhone screen after a date with the pavement. When you can’t have a decent night of sex without worrying about a trip to Planned Parenthood the next morning for a quick hit of Plan B and penicillin, perhaps it’s time to reevaluate your lifestyle.
Package opening time: 3-10 seconds
Overall Rubber Rating: 1
Slightly more durable and just as easy to obtain, these condoms are the slightly hotter cousin of Lifestyles. Much like Trojans, Durex condoms come in different styles and varieties, which makes them more consumer-friendly than the aforementioned red-wrapped disasters. But wearing them is a slippery slope, as they too can come off easily with even the tamest of kinky nights. However, they hardly break.
Package Opening time: 3-7 seconds
Overall Rubber Rating: 3
Trojan Ultra Thin
Made to feel like you’re doing the deed without a condom (even though you are), these condoms definitely feel the best for the one wearing a latex hat on his Johnson. The thinner design also means more pleasure for the partner. However, less is not always more. These condoms are so thin that they’re prone to slipping. However, true to the Trojan brand, they are not in danger of regular breakage.
Package Opening time: 1-3 seconds
Overall Rubber Rating: 3.5
Remember, lube is your friend
Usually associated with dry nether regions, lube can serve as a useful tool in any couple’s bedroom bonanza. A drop of lube in a condom adds another level of pleasure for men during sex, and adding lube into the mix reduces friction, thus reducing the chance of a broken condom and a ruined evening. Arousing lubes, such as KY’s Warming Jelly or their Yours & Mine Couples jelly, provide a warm zing that can get partners tingling. Desensitizing lube is another option for men who want stay in the game longer than usual.
When choosing a lube, it’s important for couples to know what they want — water, silicone or oil. Water-based lubes tend to be free of chemicals and easy to clean up, but require more applications during sex. They’re also great when paired with toys. If partners are looking for a lube that’s one application only, silicone is their answer. Silicone should never be used with toys, due to silicone-on-silicone chemical reactions. Due to its sticky base, silicone lubes tend to stay on longer, but are a lot harder to wash off of bedding – so beware of stains, and stay off the couch with this one. Finally, oil based lubes such as vaseline, are thicker and not to be used with condoms, as they break down the latex. This method is best for handsy couples.
It’s important for partners to test the jellies on sensitive areas of the skin in order to avoid an unsexy infection. And as with any sexual act, it’s important to know what your partner wants.