Is having a friend with benefits fun or filthy?

Daily Sundial

Hang on for a minute...we're trying to find some more stories you might like.


Email This Story






He said

It’s not beneficial to have a friend “with benefits.” For people who do not know, a friend with benefits is someone that you have a sexual relationship with virtually all the time. Having a friend that you trade “booty calls” with is also a term that has been often used.

Think about this: if you have a friend with benefits, that friend is not a true friend and neither are you a real friend to that person. You two are really associates. To some, the perks of having a friend with benefits include instant physical and emotional gratification, no responsibility and more gratification.

But those benefits are cheap.

Why would someone settle for a piece of dirt when he or she could have a field of diamonds?

Who would want to waste time with someone who may eventually disappear from his or her life?

Better said, a person that you have a true relationship with is far more valuable than an every-once-in-a-while friend whom you just occasionally have sex with. With someone you come to know, who is genuine and who wants to continue to get to know you, your relationship with that person is far better than a booty call.

The “friend” you know who has benefits might as well be an escort. There are no strings attached with an escort. You might as well be one, too.

The same friend you had sex with a day ago could easily turn on you in tough times. After all, there was no commitment in the relationship anyway. The same thing can happen with someone you know on a much deeper level, but that is more unlikely.

It is possible, however, to know a friend for a while that you just don’t want to make a commitment to, but your sexual relationship with that person will still be empty. It’s a waste of time.

The question is do you value yourself enough not to be in an empty relationship, or do you not care?

Please, care.

She said

In a era in which most people’s time is limited due to hectic schedules, engaging in a serious relationship is difficult and time-consuming. As a result of our fast-paced lifestyles, most people have taken up the dangerously-fun activity of havingfriends with benefits.

Please do not confuse this type of activity with any kind of relationship. Attempting to define a friend with benefits is dangerous and potentially disastrous.

A friend with benefits is someone who provides certain superficial and sexual needs without the intensity and commitment most relationships require. Please note that a friend-with-benefits status is simply an activity. A friend with benefits must understand that he or she is only a friend-with benefits.

In one of my friends-with-benefits experience, my friend and I, at first, had a blast going out with many friends and getting touchy-feely; however, when we started going out and talking on the phone more than usual, his feelings grew stronger for me. He no longer wanted the friends- with-benefits status, and instead desired a relationship.

His new-found feelings were a great no-no, and he broke the number one rule among friends with benefits: never get romantically attached.

Much to his dismay, I dropped him like a bad habit. When you break the rules, you lose the game.

My experiences in the world of friends with benefits have been rocky and purely experimental. Some of the friends with benefits I have had were problematic. Regardless, the initial activity is fun, thrilling, and best of all, non-committal.

Prior to entering the friends with benefits zone, both parties must know that the activities they will engage in cannot lead to anything serious. This is difficult because one person will always have more feelings for the other person. Remeber, a friend with benefits is essentially a lover.