CSUN cars honk out maintanance, driving woes

TASHIANA JEFFERSON

CSUN students beware. Since the Disney animated hit “Cars” debuted No. 1 at the box office its first weekend, the vehicles on our campus have been talking. A few cars parked in parking lot B3 had some pretty interesting things to say.

1989 Ford Taurus: “Man, it’s hotter than a carburetor in here. My owner still hasn’t fixed my air conditioning. Anybody got any anti-freeze I can borrow?”

1996 Toyota Camry: “You think this is hot? Yesterday, my owner parked me over by Starbucks to avoid paying $4. My leather seats were on fire.”

2000 Lexus: “My owner has promised to fix my rear bumper. Yet she still manages to drink on Margarita Mondays at Acapulco over on Reseda Boulevard.”

2004 Honda Accord: “I don’t understand college students. They are too into themselves these days. I have had my service light on for six months and my owner has not taken me in for service. Not to mention I have been running on fumes for the past three days now.”

2002 Chevy Tahoe: “Can you blame them? It cost nearly $60 to fill me up and lasted two days only.”

2006 Toyota Prius: “As a hybrid vehicle, I am on the Raw diet like my owner. I only take organic fuel.”

2004 Honda Accord: “I’ve got a good mind to break down on the 405 freeway in the middle of rush hour traffic.”

2002 Chevy Tahoe: “Try the 101 south instead. That freeway will be jam packed for hours. It will be all over the news. Your owner just might trade you in.”

1989 Ford Taurus: “Pump your breaks, man. College students are not at fault. My owner can not afford gas and maintenance with these summer school fees.”

2006 Toyota Prius: “But, you have $2,000 rims on your feet and a $5,000 sound system.”

1989 Ford Taurus: “I am what you call ghetto fabulous, baby. My owner gets financial aid.”

2002 Chevy Tahoe: “I hear CSUN is raising the price of the parking permit to something like $165 per semester.”

1996 Toyota Camry: “Great. Now I will never get new tags from the Department of Motor Vehicles. My owner can barely afford to pay my car registration.”

2004 Honda Accord: “With parking rates so high, you would think CSUN would have built a better parking structure. I have never seen so many blind curves.”

1996 Toyota Camry: “You noticed, too? The other day my owner almost hit a pedestrian by mistake. Someone else might not be so lucky. They should really work on that.”

1989 Ford Taurus: “Ssh. Here comes parking services. You know they spend an awful lot of time giving tickets when they really should be monitoring these stop signs for California stop-and-rolls.”

(minutes pass)

2000 Lexus: “Another parking ticket? That is the third one this month.

2004 Honda Accord: Let’s not forget about the ones from last month. Keep this up and you will be on house arrest.”

2006 Toyota Prius: “House arrest?”

2004 Honda Accord: “Yeah. That’s when they place a boot on your wheel so your owner cannot drive you.”

2002 Chevy Tahoe: “I had a boot once. My owner was caught using his grandfather’s handicapped placard in parking lot B5 in 2003.”

2000 Lexus: “I remember reading something about that in the Daily Sundial.”

2006 Toyota Prius: “Humans, who understands them?”

1989 Ford Taurus: “Hey, somebody is coming. On the count of three, let’s all set off our car alarms.”

Tashiana Jefferson can be reached at the city@csun.edu.