The student media organization of California State University Northridge

Daily Sundial

The student media organization of California State University Northridge

Daily Sundial

The student media organization of California State University Northridge

Daily Sundial

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Trouble recognizing a summer fling or true love?

Photo credit: Misael Virgen, Assistant photo editor


Dear Life & Style,

I started seeing someone at the beginning of the summer. Things have been great, and we haven’t put pressure on each other to define our relationship. However now that school is starting again and we technically are not official, I’m not sure whether to end it and focus on my studies or take a chance and pursue our fling to see if it leads to something more serious.

–Summer Fling


Dear Summer Fling,

I have been in your situation several times with relationships at the beginning of summer.

Although it is pleasurable and exciting to meet that amazing someone during summer, the question lingers: will it last or is this just a fling? It’s a difficult question to answer. The key aspect to your “relationship” is that there hasn’t been pressure to define the bond between the two of you.

Nothing is more damaging than not being direct in what your plain-hearted relationship is with each other. Recently, I had a comparable conversation with a friend to confront her with a similar situation. It’s rough, but we were both grateful about our openness. Being honest is always the best policy.

With a genuine no attachment to anyone, you can just enjoy and experience. You realize the perks of a relationship, but without the label and Facebook status.

In college, you are supposed to encounter differing, distinct, and diverse people. It’s purely up to each individual to take advantage of that connection. Did you desire a relationship with him or her, or did you fancy a fling to develop into something further?

Summer is the season when affection and attachment reign supreme because you just want to relish in passion and bliss. You just go with the flow and have fun.

Your intimacy and progression would reveal more details about your current situation. If you were quick to take your relationship to the next level in an intimate way, it translates into the idea of a temporary romance. Slow progression demonstrates your commitment to develop a relationship that’s not merely physical.

Characteristically, summer romances usually run their course within a few months. Once school concludes, all bets are off as free range and open opportunities unfold for everyone.

Luckily, today’s technology offers social networking sites like MySpace, Facebook, Twitter, etc. to help stay in touch. Additionally, e-mail, texting and cellphones make it effortless to correspond with one another. However, some of the time you wind up unintentionally stalking someone because you’re inquisitive about who they are talking to and consequently end up resenting that person.

You have to question yourself.  Is this person worth the emotional investment? Do I genuinely care about this person? If you experience hesitation with your answers, you have rightfully resolved your questions.

College is a time to experience new people, experiment, learn and socialize. This short time is a once in a lifetime adventure, so take advantage of the experience. You’re only young once, but you can be immature forever. Who knows who you may notice in one of your classes.  Without actively looking, you could be charmingly surprised with what may happen or who you come across. You never know, so just relax. Just remember to stay calm and always be confident in your decision.

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